Bringing the Semester to a Close

Now that my first semester of college is coming a close, it is important to take a step back and reflect upon how I have managed myself and my schedule over the past few months. Overall, I felt very little stress, if at any, and was not worried about my performance in the courses I was enrolled in. Since the first week of the semester, I have put forth my best effort in every course, and by doing so, I felt confident in my academic knowledge, allowing me to feel levelheaded on exam days. I took the time to prioritize my schedule, and gave myself ample time to complete all assignments. I even encouraged myself to make a habit of going to the gym roughly three days a week. I feel that this balance that I established in my lifestyle was crucial to my success, and can accurately be portrayed by the following picture:

I had hoped to be able to maintain this balance in my life throughout the entire semester, however as the last week of class is approaching, I am beginning to fall off track. With the list of assignments I need to complete overflowing and the amount of final projects that I have to finish growing, I have lost track of my daily regimes. Throughout the entire semester, I have dedicated a portion of the day to working on assignments in a corner of the UNC Charlotte library on the seventh floor. This location has proved to be the most effective spot on campus for me to think, and is where all of my major written assignments were completed. With few interruptions and a satisfying overview of the entire campus, my thoughts are able to flow freely and I am able to perform my best when working there. With the overcoming stress of finals and the short amount of time I have to finish end-of-semester assignments, however, I have not had time to work efficiently in the library. I have completed the majority of my work within the past week in my dorm, and this has proven to be very ineffective. Although I am able to eventually complete all of the tasks I need to, I am more likely to procrastinate and waste my time in my dorm. I have had no time to stick to my plan of going to the gym weekly, either, and this sudden change in my lifestyle has put me off balance. Rather than resemble the above picture, I feel that my mindset at this point at the semester is now more accurately portrayed by this picture:

Although I am significantly more stressed out at this time in the semester than I have been at any other time, I know that if I take time to relax and focus on my courses, I will continue to be successful in my academic performance and in my final exams. 

Reflection on "The Sacrament of the Present Moment"

After taking the time to read the short commentary "The Sacrament of the Present Moment" by Richard Rohr, an American Franciscan friar who often provides daily meditations and advice on his social media and in his works, I feel more awakened about where I stand in my life currently. Rohr encourages people to stray from the typical dualistic method of thinking that we are so often predisposed to, claiming that "only unitive, non dual consciousness can open our hearts, minds, and bodies." He explains that the dualistic pattern causes people to see reality only as it is, dousing the mind's capability to step outside its comfort zone and admonishes one from fully experiencing God.

Although I agree with Rohr that it is important to allow the mind to be open to everything and all possibilities, I feel that it is equally fundamental to see reality simply as it is. I have taken the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) test on multiple occasions within the past five years, and have always received the same personality type: INTJ. The "N" stands for intuition, and means that rather than always focusing on evidence and practicality, I prefer to envision ideas and the global concept before adhering to details. Likewise, I think being able to remain open-minded in life's experiences - being able to envision 'the big picture' - is an aspect that is beneficial to everyone, allowing one to understand perspectives different from their own and ultimately experience paradigm shifts.

Rohr states in his commentary, however, that "reality cannot be seen with any dualistic operation of the mind," and this is where my opinions differ from his. I agree that non dual consciousness is more mature, but I think that dualistic mindsets are useful as well. To me, the formal is more significant when it comes to ethical interpretations, but when it comes to more practical applications, I feel that the latter is more important. Ultimately, I feel that establishing an equal balance of being able to see reality as it is, while also being able to keeping their mind open to new experiences is crucial.

Do Schools Kill Creativity?

In his TedTalk "Do schools kill creativity?," Ken Robinson emphasizes the importance of education defending, rather than undermining, creativity. He explains that globally, technical courses such as math and sciences, languages, and humanities are more heavily regarded than art courses, speaking about how fundamental arts are to society.

Having attended a predominantly STEM-oriented high school, Sacred Heart Academy, I have experienced this radical difference between the two subject areas firsthand. When I first applied to Sacred Heart, there was a significant emphasis on dance, art, and music capabilities, and all students were required to take a full credit hour of one of these tracks. Throughout my years there, however, more science and technology course were introduced into the school system, allowing for courses such as 3D Design to be an accepted substitute for a drawing or painting course. Sacred Heart still continues to advertise itself as a school with enhanced art programs, but the STEM programs have grown extensively and have gained more attention in recent years, and some of the art programs have gained less.

Although I understand where Robinson is coming from in saying that the education systems need to encourage more creativity, I am also inclined to argue that some of the subjects at the top of the hierarchy do encourage creative thinking, albeit in a less traditional way. As I just stated, my high school recently introduced the 3D Design course, and allows it to be taken rather than a more hands-on form of artistic expression. Nevertheless, I feel that technological courses like 3D Design are higher up in the education hierarchy, yet encourage a similar form of imaginative release.

 Have artistic courses risen or fallen in the academic hierarchy since Robinson's speech in 2006? With the increase of innovative technology, such as smart pens, 3D printing, and art tablets in the past decade, have these courses benefited or suffered? Since I do not have extensive knowledge about worldwide education, Robinson's speech makes me interested in researching more about the current focus of and future expectations for education systems.

Responding to Hard Choices

When it comes to making difficult decisions, I always compile a list of the benefits and disadvantages of all possible choices, ultimately selecting the option whose benefits far outweigh those of its competitors. Should I ask for new clothes or new books for my birthday? Which wall calendar should I buy? Should I accept my admission to UNC Charlotte, Clemson, or another college? Creating a list to determine the best possible solution always seemed the most reasonable approach when stuck between choices. After listening to Ruth Chang's TedTalk, "How to make hard choices," however, introduced to me to a new perspective on decision-making.

Chang explains that "the reasons that govern our choices as correct or incorrect sometimes run out, and ... we have the power to create reasons for ourselves to become the distinctive people that we are." She supports that hard choices are hard because values cannot be quantified. In my earlier statement, I used terms such as "outweigh" and "solution," but Chang argues that at times, there is no way to determine which alternative is better than the other because aspects of some choices cannot be given a number. Rather than being rational about decision-making, she suggests finding reasons for choosing a decision. By allowing ourselves to take a stand behind one choice rather than the other, Chang explains that we are able to come up with our own reasons to make the choices we do, and this makes for a more effective decision, as there is no better alternative other than the one we make reasons for. 

Although I had some difficulty comprehending what Chang meant, I can try to apply her reasoning method to everyday choices I make. I find it confusing that there is no way to quantify decisions. If I were to give an alternative some reason to choose it, I would still see this as a benefit. I do not understand how can be more options other than one alternative being better than the other and alternatives being equal, as Chang stated. Nevertheless, I will try to think about my personal reasons to make decisions in the future. 

On Writing and Procrastination

I recently read Megan Mcardle's article, "Why Writers are the Worst Procrastinators," published on the online news network The Atlantic. Before delving into the writing, I thought to myself, do I really have time to read this article? It's so long! Thinking about the four-page reflective memorandum due tomorrow that I have yet to start for my engineering course, I decided that I did have time and began to read.

For the majority of the article, I was stunned by how much I found myself relating to the poor mindsets explained by Mcardle. For years, I have nodded off my extreme procrastination habits to working better and more efficiently under pressure, however this article made me understand my true reasons for putting off writing assignments until the last possible minute: given an excess amount of time and in fear of writing badly, I would rather not write anything at all until the pressure of a looming deadline becomes too extreme, and the fear of not performing well is overtaken by the fear of not turning in the assignment. This article has made clear to me what I have been blind to all throughout high school and my first year of college. I see talent as an innate and engrained ability, rather than a skill that can be taught and developed.

Following along with the article's examples, I had always been the child who would finish readings and projects before my classmates in elementary school. I had always told myself that this was simply because I was good at reading, or good at the subject the project was for. Even now, as a college student, if I finish an exam earlier than the majority of the class, I tell myself it's because I am naturally good at solving differential equations. This article has allowed me to recognize my error in this perception. I now realize that, although I may be more inclined to easily remembering how to solve differential equations, my success in this course is not because of natural talent in math - it's because of the dedication and commitment I put into understanding how to evaluate solutions and learn equations.

I did not expect to undergo a paradigm shift by reading this article, but now that I have, I am going to try to change my working habits. Rather than put off writing assignments until several hours before the deadline, I will attempt to at least create an outline or introduction several days in advance. By acknowledging the error in my judgment of my own abilities, I hope to be able to make a change in my habits for the better.

Happiness

In his TedTalk "How to buy happiness," Michael Norton argues against the typical belief that money cannot buy happiness, articulating that way in which people spend their money influences their happiness. Norton produced several results from experiments he instigated worldwide that ultimately revealed the same trend: people who spend money on others rather than themselves tend to be happier, as doing something for others makes people feel that they have made a positive impact on someone else.

I thoroughly agree with Norton's statements, and have experienced this personally. When I worked at Target as a cashier, one of my coworkers, Barb, would always offer to buy the other cashiers a drink after she ended her shift. She did this every day, not limiting the number of people she bought drinks for. I felt bad saying yes to her because I didn't feel that she needed to, so I always refused her offer. One of the last days before leaving my hometown and my job for college, Barb talked me into accepting her offer, explaining to me that doing little things for others, like buying something to drink, honestly made her day. The joy that she caused others by giving them a drink in turn made her feel good about her influence in our own lives.

Between having a person in my life like Barb and listening to Norton's speech, I am encouraged to do the same. Although I cannot relate specifically because I haven't spent money on others except for birthday and holiday gifts for my family, there are some things that I do for others that make me happy. Recently, I bought an abundance of holiday cards for my friends back in my hometown, and plan to send them in the mail to wish them the best in their end-of-semester exams and a happy holiday. I enjoy doing small acts of kindness for others, and will continue to look for opportunities to do so.

Who is a Scholar, Really?

The experiences that Ed Dante explained in his story "The Shadow Scholar," published by The Chronicle, made me extremely worried, as I have several contradicting opinions about his work. Dante retells several correspondences he has had while working for his individually owned custom-writing company. Although he makes a living by writing an extensive amount of papers, Dante's name cannot be found on any published work. Commissioned by hundreds of students a year, he formulates essays for high school students and college graduates alike, who would rather pay Dante to write their graduate thesis or college application essays a ludicrous amount of money rather than take the time and energy to create a report in their own words. Needless to say, the name 'Ed Dante' is simply a pseudonym this writer has used to share his stories about his aboriginal career without bringing his identity to public knowledge.

Dante's business goes against everything I had learned growing up about honesty and success. In high school, I was familiar with the idea that some of my classmates had tutors who practically worked on their homework or wrote essays for them, but the business explained in this story takes this enterprise to an entirely new level. I knew that companies similar to Dante's had to have existed, the amount of students unwilling to dedicate their time to writing with their own words being fairly large, but I had no idea that this type of company could be so engrained into the education system.

Dante takes a significant portion of his retelling to explain how he had written an entire graduate thesis essay, totaling over 130 pages in length, by simply using capricious sources found online, even mentioning how he often relies on Amazon previews and corresponding reviews for information. Several aspects of this worries me. Firstly, the fact that a graduate student had chosen to rely on the efforts of an uncredible stranger to gain a degree is terrifying to me. What does this say about our education system? How can a person with so little motivation so as to not even be willing to attempt to write their own thesis statement have been able to earn the title of 'graduate student', and potentially 'graduate'? Also, how does this falsification impact me as a current student? Does this make my efforts matter more or less valuable in the future job world, if some of my future coworkers had been this student? The idea that a company like Dante's and many more exist, and have a reliable number of customers, makes me question the legitimacy of today's education.

Taking Claim of Your 20s

In her TedTalk "Why 30 is not the new 20", clinical psychologist Meg Jay uses her clientele experience to encourage emerging adults to take charge of life sooner rather than later. She explains to her audience a reoccurring similarity she had noticed in her younger clients: many see their twenties as their "extended adolescence," and fail to expand their career and relationships. She uses an example of a client, Emma, who had felt that she had lost control of her life in all aspects, primarily family and work. She had faced the full front of a mid-life crisis by her mid-twenties. Jay explains how through dedication to develop an "identity capitol," Emma was able to find a job of interest, and build a family of her own.

With next year being my twentieth birthday, now is the exact moment I needed to hear this advice. Several of courses in this semester, especially my introduction to engineering course, have helped me to define a career plan and determine my true passion. Having established this, I feel prepared to take advantage of the opportunities ahead of me.

Jay's speech although daunting, is encouraged and makes me understand the importance of networking. She mentioned that nearly half of available jobs are not posted anywhere, relying on human connection rather than online advertisements to draw in reliable applicants. This explanation makes me more motivated to talk with professionals in my designated career and build these connections early, to ensure that I do not waste my time and find myself in a crisis situation.

On Walking to Improve Performance

Within my first semester in college, I have developed a new habit to help my memorization and thinking: walking. The day before or morning of an exam, I will write down several key facts I will need for the test on index cards, then proceed to either walk around my dorm room, repeating the information, or go for a walk around campus with the deck of cards in my hand. I hadn't done this during my high school years because I had not felt the need to, however, with needing to know a significantly greater amount of information for my college courses, I have developed this new study strategy, and it has proven effective. The motion of walking around stimulates my mind and encourages me to think more productively than I would by sitting at a desk and memorizing information in my partially unorganized notebooks.

An article published in The New Yorker by Ferris Jabr, entitled "Why Walking Helps Us Think," reiterates and supports my realization that walking around encourages the mind to think more erratically, allowing for a greater attention span and better memorization. I found it interesting that this article assigned to me for my english course related so similarly to my study habits. Not only did the article explain how walking is a more productive method to stimulate the brain to think than remaining immobile, it also mentioned that spending time in green spaces tends to rejuvenate one's mental capacity from exhaustion and fatigue. Last year, I read an article claiming that green highlighters are more effective than the typical yellow or orange-pigmented markers because the brain is more inclined to have a heightened memory retention under green hues. At the time, I doubted the legitimacy of this claim, but nevertheless switched to writing in green pens, and have felt that this change improved my memorization. The fact that this article discusses the advantages of walking in a green space further supports what I had read last year, and I found this connection interesting.

After reading this article, I am encouraged to continue my newfound study habit, and possibly walk around UNC Charlotte's botanical gardens to see if the green scenery can help my memorization even more.

On Gaining New Perceptions Through Peer Review

As I tend to fear judgment of my writing capabilities, I have refrained from opportunities to engage in peer review in the past, however, as peer review is implemented into my freshman course, it was unavoidable. I was worried at first, and was nervous to share my assignment drafts with my group, however after having fully experienced this form of critiquing, I am glad that my english course pushed me out of my comfort zone. Both gaining feedback about my writing skills from my peers and providing advice to my peers to strength their ideas have ultimately benefitted me. Allowing my peers to comment on my drafts without me defending my work has given me insight into new writing perspectives.

The most influential advice I received thus far regarded my Extended Inquiry Project, in which I chose to research and write about the infringement of privacy rights via the usage of modern technology. Initially, my topic had been much too vague, and would not have formulated an in-depth paper. My peers talked to me about this, as asked me several key questions to encourage me to specify my topic further. "Are you going to focus on multiple types of technology, or a specific kind?" "How are you going to talk about such a vague term like privacy?" Comments like these influenced me to ultimately discuss how the Fourth Amendment protects consumer privacy in relation to surveillance technology. Likewise, the questions I posed to my peers also served as a means of self-reflection for my own paper. On multiple occasions, I had asked, "Is this phrase really necessary?," and "Is there a way to make these sentences more concise?" Asking these questions influenced me to ask myself the same questions when finalizing assignments.

MIT Tech's video, entitled "No One Writes Alone: Peer Review in the Classroom, A Guide for Students," reinforces all of the aspects I mentioned about my own experience with peer review. Not only do the instructors in the video discuss the importance of sharing perspectives, but they also explain how peer review comes into play in the professional workplace. Many stated that in jobs, peer review is no longer limited to others of equal levels; rather, peers can be new employees or experts at the same job. I had not considered how critiquing in the workplace is different than in a classroom setting, and this video provided good information for me to keep in consideration for my future.

Thoughts on "From Degrading to De-Grading"

So far in the semester, I have had difficulty with maintaining my blog posts. Although the idea of keeping a blog and responding to assigned articles seeming exciting to me at first, I have begun to consider the reflective writing as more of a burden than an expression of thought. In the past, I have had a blog and published regularly with little difficulty, and had expected the same for this blog. The fact that up keeping this blog had been in a course syllabus and the readings assigned, however, seems to have discouraged me to write freely about my thoughts. Even though this blog is not evaluated according to a rubric, I still have had difficulty encouraging myself to voice my opinion on the assigned articles.

The article "From Degrading to De-Grading," by Alfie Kohn, discusses the negative implications of grading systems on student motivation, a topic that I found myself relating to. The publication discusses the difference between the "grading orientation" and "learning orientation", claiming that the former is the root cause for students to have less interest in learning. By enforcing a grading policy on assignments, students tend to focus more on the numbers that will define their grade rather than the quality of their work. This article has made me realize that I need to reevaluate the way I think about my assignments, not only for my freshman writing course, but also for all of the other courses I am taking this semester. Despite not having a solid grading system for my blog posts, I have been stuck thinking about the fact that maintaining a blog counts for a portion of 100 points for my writing course, and this quantitative value has negatively impacted how I perform in my blogging efforts. Having had successfully maintained a blog in the past in my personal time and had no difficulty then, I feel that thinking of my posts as assignments, not just as grades, has dissuaded me from succeeding in maintaining blog posts thus far.

After reading this article, I am going to focus my efforts on transforming my perspective to a "learning orientation" rather than a "grade/assignment orientation." I feel that if I am able to successfully make this change, I will be more motivated to perform my best in all of my assignments this semester.

Thoughts on "Shitty First Drafts"

In a selection from her novel Birds by Birds entitled "Shitty First Drafts," Anne Lamott shares an anecdote about how her struggle with beginning writing assignments for her job, specifically a restaurant review. She explains the panic that enveloped her when she sat down to formulate drafts of her commentaries, thinking that she "would not be able to get the magic to work this time," and calling herself a failure. Ultimately, however, Lamott had been able to overcome her fear of failure. After taking time to walk away from her work and calm down, she revisited her computer and began to write without censoring her thoughts. Instead of debating whether or not her sentences were worthy of being included in her final review, she simply focused on getting her ideas out on a tangible piece of paper. Not worrying about judgment, Lamott was able to successfully formulate a (very rough) draft of her review and begin her writing process.

Reading this except made me relieved; I often find difficulty with beginning writing assignments for the same reason Lamott did: the fear of judgment and not creating decent writing right away causes me to worry about formulating my ideas on paper. I feel that I can take away a big lesson from this selection. If I try to focus simply on getting my ideas written down, and not on the quality of my work, I will not only be able to develop a start, albeit how poorly written, but I will also be able to express my thoughts more clearly than if I try to hard to make my wiring sound professional.

I have time to attempt to integrate this lesson into my writing habits, and intend to practice it in my writing this semester. If I can focus on getting my ideas down first, and look towards proper grammar and formatting later, I feel that I can successfully expand my current writing habits.

Dear Malcolm Letter

Dear Malcolm,

My name is Janessa Schwallie, and I am a mechanical engineering major. I grew up out of state in Buffalo, New York, however within the past month, my mom and I moved into a neighborhood right outside the town in Mooresville, North Carolina. I decided upon engineering as a plan of study not only because I enjoy problem solving (I brought two books full of Sudoku puzzles to my dorm), but also because my past calculus and physics teachers were always so welcoming and made my classes a lot of fun. That being said, I’m looking forward to all the new experiences that college has to offer, from expressive and creative courses (like this writing class) to clubs and sports games.

I have a pretty small family – my parents are divorced, so it’s just me and my mom, my grandma, and my aunt. I don’t have any siblings or cousins, but I’ve always grown up with a Bichon Frise in my house (I’m pretty sure I’ve had four in total!). I’ve spent almost all my life so far in Buffalo up until this summer, and North Carolina is a pretty big change, the most obvious being the weather. Last year November was probably one of the biggest snow storms I’ve seen in a while. I woke up one Friday to over six feet of snow in my driveway, and when a snowplow came to clear it away, the plow got stuck and a tow truck had to come to pull it out. Needless to say, I didn’t have school the following week. I’m used summers that have a max temperature in the mid-80s, so I’m going to have to get used to the humidity in Charlotte, but I think I’ll be able to handle it!

I went to a small private high school up in Buffalo, and I had roughly one hundred other seniors in my graduating class. Although I played a lot of sports in middle school, from synchronized swimming to basketball, I stayed away from the (very) competitive atmosphere of my school’s sports teams, instead playing intramural volleyball for two years. My junior year I participated in Science Olympiad and worked in a small team to build a wireless robotic arm for an event. The club that I enjoyed the most, however, was the Team American Rocketry Challenge club I joined my senior year. I loved learning about the mechanics behind building a rocket – for weeks I helped with cutting the fins and saw dusting them down, gluing in the nose cone, and programming a small device called an altimeter to record the height the rocket would travel. Despite it being the first year my school offered the club, the hard work of my teammates and I qualified us to compete in the national competition in Washington, DC this past spring, and I appreciated every second of it.

My grandparents having had moved down to North Carolina about nine years ago, I’ve spent most of my summers since sixth grade around Charlotte and the nearby towns visiting them. The summers after my seventh and eighth grades I spent several weeks at UNCC in camps that several of my grandparents’ neighbors recommended. Both my mom and I really loved the towns and weather in North Carolina and had planned to move from New York for a while now, however since I wanted to finish in my high school in Buffalo, I didn’t officially move to Mooresville until this summer, despite having already come to visit my grandparents for most summers and holidays. When it came to applying to colleges last year, I immediately thought of UNCC because of how much fun I had at the summer camps, and when I visited for a tour, I fell in love with it because of the campus and how close it is to the city.

For the most part, I’m a very organized person – I love using storage bins and I try to keep my bookshelves at home in alphabetical order. When it comes to making plans to hang out with friends, I tend to be the one to organize a night out for laser tag or a movie. I also really like to bake desserts (I made a ton of Oreo cake pops for move-in day last week) and make crepes for my family on the weekends.

I’m always up for trying new things – from different foods (I tried pasta with squid once on a school trip to France) to new types of music. Although I would consider myself more of a left brain person, I’m looking forward to explore my creative side in this writing course!

Janessa Schwallie